I will share details about myself and my journey just so people can relate and know they are not alone. I do not like to share these things. Starting from the age of 6 me and Heather my sister were close and yes we had our sibling issues but she was my whole world. We had our brother Jerry and cousins Danny and Sammy and we also had our sister Christina alive at this time. When I was 7 my father or sperm doner I should say, was very addicted to drugs and alcohol and was acutally a drug dealer I found out later. He started to beat us, sexually abuse us, emotionally abuse us and he did this to our mom too. I remember my brother and him fighting a lot and sometimes my borhter would go to jail over these fights. The abuse continued until I was taken away. He got me addicted to drugs and I did this becuase I thought he would love me this way which never happened. Right before being taken away our sister Christina had passed away and my friend/boyfriend at the time had killed himself. I bounced around between men that were older than me as I just wanted love and none of them treated me right and always left. I waas raped again at the age of 13. Then there was a 19 year old I had slept with and I was 13 he was caught and went to jail. I was taken away at 13 for selling my fathers drugs. I went to a childrens jail and then i was a ward of the state. My brother and his wife fought hard to become my foster parents. They succeeded and I ended up on ISP. Once I was taken away to my brother and his wifes in a new town I went to a new school. I started dating a guy who I got close to but eventially left for a guy older than me. The person I dated beofre had died later in an accident. So I was with an older guy at this point and when ISP was over and it was time to go home no one wanted me but my sister in law did even though by this time her and my brother were going through a divorce. My neice was so little but always by my side as was my sister. She would have kept me and to this ay I wondered why I never stayed with her and my niece. I ended up leaving and moving in with the boyfriend I had at the time and his family, aside from my foster dad , this was the worst experience I could have done. He kept leaving me and his mom kept kicking me out or being abusive. I ended up starting to have seizures from panic attacks and anxiety which was so difficult. My mom at this time had gotten a divorce from my father thank god but had a boyfriend that never liked me. Then my sister got in an acciident, mind you she was the most imporatnt person in my life besides my niece and foster dad. She was my number one though. My family was not even going to let me say goodbye thank god for my brothers friend, who i would later be engaged to. She ended up dying from the accident she was in and this crumbled my whole world I coulnd't handle it. The seizures got worse the panic got worse. I had tried so many medications at this point. Eventually I became suicidal. My foster mom and her son always had me bouncing around and did not care about me. My mom put me in a mental hospital and at this time I was addicted to drugs agaain. I was there for months because no one wanted to take me. My mom finally agreed just to thorw me in a group home a few days later although I had done nothing wrong. The cops made her release me and my foster dad and his wife came to get me. Now at this time she got me addicted to meth spent all my student loan money then kicked me again but this time with my two animals and zero money. My mom came just to take me and then left me again in cheyenne at a drug dealers house. Thank god for my sisters girlfriend that she had before she died who by the way was my best friend evoer. She came and got me and my animals. Then I ended up at my brothers frineds house and we ended up engaged. The drugs got worse though and eventaually it got really bad and then my foster dad killed himself. MInd you before this happened I lost two more friends to suicide. Once I left my fiannce I ended up in abusive relationships and was raped a total of 4 more times so adding it up this would have been 5 rapes not to mention my father. I left and got abused over and over and over again. Druing my addiction I lost all the people I loved like my childhood best friend, my bestest friend that Heather was seeing before she died, and my best friend from gillette. The real people who cared I had lost in the mix of it all. So I was homeless a lot so much I was so used to it that when I had a place to stay it just seemed weird and I knew it would only be a few days at a time. Finally I ended up marrying my heroin dealer who was also very abusive. Finally I was taken to jail after turning myself in and got some more charges while doing this and ended up in rehab. This saved my life. I ended up getting out and eventually was able to get another cat which I lost all my animals in my addiction and then my brother came out of nowwhere and took me to my fathers in Gillette where I reconnected withone of my friends and met my partner and my person and we started a family while I was separated from my soon to be ex husband and finally got the divorce. Everything I ever wanted I finally had with my partner. It took a long time for us to figure out what a family and healthy relationship looked like. I ended up a workaholic and a gambling addict while on probation for five years. My sobriety I worked hard on as did the rest of my issues. To this day I am on mental health disability for panic disorder, anxiety, ptsd, adhd, depression, bipolar, and avoidant persoanlity disorder. Before this I was able to work. After my kids though I got bad postpartum and had a doctor who never helped. I had tried so many medications and he never cared or knew what he was doing. I can now say after everything I have a good team of doctors, a good support team, a beautiful family and I am in schools with huge goals that I will accomplish no matter what! I had been raped and beated and abused and an addict and traumatized so bad from so many things. My partner saved my life. He has been more than supportive of everything about me and more and hes an amazing dad and person and I am lucky I made it out even though I am on disability and made it into schools to build a future and not let my mental health defeat me. I finally started to set boundaries to be treated right and not more abuse. Life has been so hard but I made it. There is so much more to these stories this is just a summarization of it. I am setting out to save as many people animals and plants as I can and the world. I will be giong to three schools. I finally reconnected with my best friend from gillette, found a couple friends here, and just now connected with my childhood best friend. My partner is also the best person I will ever come across he is one of a kind. I made it out and through so much if you want more deatils or want to talk or someone to relate jsut message me. I will be here for you.